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REVIEW: Kane & Lynch

You are a horrible, horrible game. I am not sure I want to keep you in my Steam library, next to my other good games.

  • You are boring.
  • Your controls suck.
  • 3rd person with the character off center sucks.
  • Your weapons are lame.
  • You tried to be like the movie Heat, but failed.
  • You’re either a realistic shooter or a fun shooter; you can’t be both.
  • Just because the characters are criminals doesn’t mean 75% of all the dialogue should be swear words. I think one of the worst lines was “That fucking old fucker fucking took it.” Seriously.
  • Your characters are super one-dimensional. Oh I know you thought they weren’t with your sparkling dialogue, but no, they suck.

Do not play/buy this game. I think its metacritic score of 62 was too high by 50 points. You get 12 points for figuring out how to make levels and how to move characters through them (albeit poorly).

I know there is a sequel coming out. I am not holding my breath for it.

11:05 pm: iomegadrive